Prison Cuisine Good Eats Behind Bars

[Santa's Little Helper]

I don't doubt a number of you judging by the posts have DONE TIME

In the late 1990's early 2000's I spent better part of about 4 years as an inmate of the Wisconsin Department Of Corrections I am a FELON on Arson and Insurance Fraud charges

Well prison chow sucks but ya get used to it actually my favorite was Sturtevant Correctional Institution and call me crazy they served a mean TATER-TOT caserolle

When the chow hall is lean we inmates pool canteen items and make a recipie that goes something like this

Jailhouse Burritos

[Santa's Little Helper]

Jailhpuse burritos continued

6 ramen packs 3 chilli pouches a summer sausage cubed hot sauce and squeeze tube cheese
Cooking in medium or minnimun facilities they got microwave in the dayroom in Max at Portage trade a pack of cigarettes for a fan or radio cord strip the ends bare copper make a stinger IMPORTANT first dip bare ends into slop or coffee water then plug in otherwise in reverse ypu blow the sockets and the rest of cellblock looses power too not a pretty site a shiv-able offense

[Conley]

Reminds me of college. I was hot pot chef extraordinaire. I'd eat crunchy ramen, al dente ramen, soft ramen. About the only thing I didn't do was snort the powdered sauce packets.

[Santa's Little Helper]

On the canteen DOC offered bags of cookies think Famous Amos Ge neric and a $1.50 for a good size bag

I'd take a napkin or paper towel lay abunch out 20 seconds in the microwave

Everybody looked at me like I was crazy then I made extras handed them out

Sure its not like moms home baked don't go there but cheap canteen cookies and 20 seconds in microwave has a fresh baked quality

I went from being eccentric to next canteen people was standing in line with cookies for microwave

On the rec yard brothas used to go "Cookie Man"

Again not moms home baked but the BEST you will have in jail

[Conley]

Can't believe I never thought to microwave those cookies...I don't eat that stuff anymore but if I'm ever in such a situation again (maybe in the post-apocalyptic USA after NOK hits us EMP style Peter1469), when we are thankful for processed food, preservatives and packaging and gathered around the campfire , I will remember these words and heat them on rocks for a short bit! TY good sir.

[Santa's Little Helper]

Reminds me of college. I was hot pot chef extraordinaire. I'd eat crunchy ramen, al dente ramen, soft ramen. About the only thing I didn't do was snort the powdered sauce packets.I never turned on to crunchy ramen even in max after the box my first celly at Portage had and showed me a stinger "prison hotplate" although at the Wisconsin Resource Center there was a guy who took ramens and spread peanut butter over the brick and crunched and at Sturtevant another guy took a snickers bars and micrawave melted over a ramen brick.thought it was tits

[roadmaster]

I wouldn't care what they fed inmates. The last thing I would want to do is to be locked up with people telling me what I could do everyday. Never been arrested but have visited many.

[Santa's Little Helper]

I wouldn't care what they fed inmates. The last thing I would want to do is to be locked up with people telling me what I could do everyday. Never been arrested but have visited many.Bet you WOULD CARE if you were LOCKED UPHolocaust Diet was Milwaukee Country JailDowntowm is a 10/12 story highrise central booking with underground tunnel direct to CourthouseIn Franklin Wisconsin about Racine County Line is the Milwaukee House Of Correction at 2500 inmates is the LARGEST JAIL in WISCONSIN twice the size of the largest Department Of Corrections Facility yet the State DOC houses 20 THOUSAND INMATES

[Greenridgeman]

I wouldn't care what they fed inmates. The last thing I would want to do is to be locked up with people telling me what I could do everyday. Never been arrested but have visited many.


I've never been convicted, or, in jail long enough to try to eat.

Long ago, in a land far away, before I grew up, I used to do quite a few crazy things.

To avoid having to stop, always had 20 extra gallon of gas, two spares, and have cooked many a meal under the hood, wrapped in foil.

Thank goodness I never had to try jailhouse food or cooking.

[roadmaster]

Well I don't think we should feed them slop. They are not animals even tho some did horrible things.

[Conley]

I've never been convicted, or, in jail long enough to try to eat.

Long ago, in a land far away, before I grew up, I used to do quite a few crazy things.

To avoid having to stop, always had 20 extra gallon of gas, two spares, and have cooked many a meal under the hood, wrapped in foil.

Thank goodness I never had to try jailhouse food or cooking.

This is good advice...I'm just messing with you now but if you can cook a meal under the hood without stopping then you're pretty bad ass :)

I've run out of gas too many times, been hungry many times, but always make sure to keep a lot of water in the car. I'm not a prepper but some stuff is just common sense and a few MREs/ramen back there would be smart

[Greenridgeman]

Bet you WOULD CARE if you were LOCKED UPHolocaust Diet was Milwaukee Country JailDowntowm is a 10/12 story highrise central booking with underground tunnel direct to CourthouseIn Franklin Wisconsin about Racine County Line is the Milwaukee House Of Correction at 2500 inmates is the LARGEST JAIL in WISCONSIN twice the size of the largest Department Of Corrections Facility yet the State DOC houses 20 THOUSAND INMATES



Don't do the crime, if you can't do the time.



Or, don't get convicted of the crime if you can't do the time.

Sometimes a man gotta do what a man gotta do.

I always stressed two things to the at risk of jail kids that I taught.

One, don't do time for some punk ass job that would not help change your life, rob the bank, don't mug the banker in the parking lot, so to speak, and two, if you do time, when punitive anal sex is going down, make sure you are on top.


Never had a parent call me down on that advice, but, had several tell me thanks for spelling it out clear.

[Greenridgeman]

This is good advice...I'm just messing with you now but if you can cook a meal under the hood without stopping then you're pretty bad ass :)

I've run out of gas too many times, been hungry many times, but always make sure to keep a lot of water in the car. I'm not a prepper but some stuff is just common sense and a few MREs/ramen back there would be smart



I was a prepper in my young days. Being prepared kept me out of jail more than once. Two spares HAVE been used, long runs through desert without gas stations have been made, I have winched out truck loads of weed that went off the trail in the dark.

If you do crazy things, and are not prepared for the worst case scenarios, then you are crazy.

[Conley]

I hear ya...I meant a doomsday prepper. If you're planning for doomsday I think your best bet is becoming a ninja or at least very good with firearms, ammo and losing your conscience. When the shit hits the fan you would need to be able to protect and when necessary take what you need.

[Conley]

Don't do the crime, if you can't do the time.



Or, don't get convicted of the crime if you can't do the time.

Sometimes a man gotta do what a man gotta do.

I always stressed two things to the at risk of jail kids that I taught.

One, don't do time for some punk ass job that would not help change your life, rob the bank, don't mug the banker in the parking lot, so to speak, and two, if you do time, when punitive anal sex is going down, make sure you are on top.


Never had a parent call me down on that advice, but, had several tell me thanks for spelling it out clear.

Or sometimes you can't afford a good defense.

[Peter1469]

I ate at a prison a couple of times. In law school we had to get 50 hours of legal community service. So I did my time at Angola Prison helping out with legal stuff like parole hearings. The mess hall reminded me of a typical army mess hall.

[roadmaster]

Angola Prison Did you know they did a movie there? Not sure if it's on DVD but it's on VHS.

[Peter1469]

I think so- it had lots of chain gain scenes with white prison guards wearing mirror sunglasses, on horses, with shot guns. And blacks (mostly) on the chain gang. I don't recall the name of it.

[roadmaster]

I think so- it had lots of chain gain scenes with white prison guards wearing mirror sunglasses, on horses, with shot guns. And blacks (mostly) on the chain gang. I don't recall the name of it.

I have it, believe it's called life or inside Angola prison. Been a while.

[Greenridgeman]

I ate at a prison a couple of times. In law school we had to get 50 hours of legal community service. So I did my time at Angola Prison helping out with legal stuff like parole hearings. The mess hall reminded me of a typical army mess hall.



Angola is where Louisiana puts you away to die.

Death is the ticket out for 85% of them.

[roadmaster]

Angola is where Louisiana puts you away to die.

Death is the ticket out for 85% of them.

That you are correct or was back then.

[Peter1469]

It was under federal supervision for a long time.

[Greenridgeman]

It was under federal supervision for a long time.


It has always been a cesspool of corruption.

The prison industry in Louisiana creates hundreds of jobs for the lesser spawn of the cheaper politicians.

[Mister D]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jM23S12LXaE

[Greenridgeman]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jM23S12LXaE

Parchman is another bad ass place.