Top 10 reasons why the US should invade Canada

[Captain Obvious]

Stay with me on this, it makes sense.

In no particular order also.


10) Culture: What is Canadian culture? What's the first thing you think of when you say "Canada"? Right, maple syrup (I tried it out on a couple people, 100% said just that). It's a commodity, not an identity.

So what's Canadian? Hockey? Nope, the NHL is a US league and only exists because of the American market. Clearly hockey is an American sport.

Poutine? What the $#@! is that? Gravy on french fries - how is that original? It's been done for centuries in many cultures. Oh wait, cheese curds - right, that's the Canadian part, pfft... It's like someone said "eh... what's this aboot, needs more, what's in the fridge?" "eh... bacon... syrup... beer, wait - use this, I bought it for fishing bait."

Poutine and maple syrup is a cry for help, won't you please help?


9) Liberation: From fascist, imperialist England. No longer will Canadians have to kiss the royal crown's ass and they can free themselves from the obsession of royal socialites. Then and only then will they ever know true freedom and independence.

Every other highway can now be changed from "King" or "Queen" way-something-or-another to... MLK Boulevard.

Gordie Howe on the loonie!


8) Don Cherry



Nuff said...


7) Political identity: Polling a few random people I asked "who is the prime minister of Canada". Survey said: Unanimous 50 yard stare.

I asked the same people who Rob Ford was and most of them knew which leads me to the conclusion that Canada's political system needs a shake up, that when Rob Ford was all the excitement in Canada for a short period of time in an otherwise droll, undefined political system is pretty much self explanatory.

Besides, Canada is basically a puppet state to the throne.


6) Potential market expansion for the NHL: It's time we bring "hockey" back to "Canadian hockey". Being absorbed by the US as the 51'st state (who, by population count would be our second largest state next to California) the number of Canadian NHL teams will easily double. There is a bit of interest in hockey in Canada from what I understand but with the surge of 'Murica after the invasion demand for the NHL will surge.

I can virtually guarantee it.


5) Identity: Canadians are basically America light, why not make them full blown Americans? That way they don't have to pretend anymore. We can see how infatuated they are with American politics and culture, hell most Canadians know more about our current and history than they do about theirs.

I bet more people in Canada know who Donald Trump is than Gary Trudeau.

...wait, Justin.

This way they don't have to pretend anymore. Think of what that will do for their self esteem.




4) So that the idiot-in-chief doesn't decide to build a wall on the northern border.


3) Justin Bieber: So what does the Canadian music industry bring to the table? Elvis? The Beatles? Abba?

Nope - this guy:



How is that not grounds for retaliation? You tell me.


2) Sarah Palin could be able to see America from her back porch.


1) John Candy started it, it's time for us to finish it.

[HawkTheSlayer]

Hold on now.
William Shatner is canadian. So are Trey Parker and Matt Stone.
I love me some canucks.

The Soros puppet Justine Turdo is da one dat needs to go.

Attachment 26031Attachment 26032Attachment 26033Attachment 26034[ATTACH]

[Peter1469]

The CIA and DOD are dusting off our attack Canada plans are we speak....

[donttread]

Stay with me on this, it makes sense.

In no particular order also.


10) Culture: What is Canadian culture? What's the first thing you think of when you say "Canada"? Right, maple syrup (I tried it out on a couple people, 100% said just that). It's a commodity, not an identity.

So what's Canadian? Hockey? Nope, the NHL is a US league and only exists because of the American market. Clearly hockey is an American sport.

Poutine? What the $#@! is that? Gravy on french fries - how is that original? It's been done for centuries in many cultures. Oh wait, cheese curds - right, that's the Canadian part, pfft... It's like someone said "eh... what's this aboot, needs more, what's in the fridge?" "eh... bacon... syrup... beer, wait - use this, I bought it for fishing bait."

Poutine and maple syrup is a cry for help, won't you please help?


9) Liberation: From fascist, imperialist England. No longer will Canadians have to kiss the royal crown's ass and they can free themselves from the obsession of royal socialites. Then and only then will they ever know true freedom and independence.

Every other highway can now be changed from "King" or "Queen" way-something-or-another to... MLK Boulevard.

Gordie Howe on the loonie!


8) Don Cherry



Nuff said...


7) Political identity: Polling a few random people I asked "who is the prime minister of Canada". Survey said: Unanimous 50 yard stare.

I asked the same people who Rob Ford was and most of them knew which leads me to the conclusion that Canada's political system needs a shake up, that when Rob Ford was all the excitement in Canada for a short period of time in an otherwise droll, undefined political system is pretty much self explanatory.

Besides, Canada is basically a puppet state to the throne.


6) Potential market expansion for the NHL: It's time we bring "hockey" back to "Canadian hockey". Being absorbed by the US as the 51'st state (who, by population count would be our second largest state next to California) the number of Canadian NHL teams will easily double. There is a bit of interest in hockey in Canada from what I understand but with the surge of 'Murica after the invasion demand for the NHL will surge.

I can virtually guarantee it.


5) Identity: Canadians are basically America light, why not make them full blown Americans? That way they don't have to pretend anymore. We can see how infatuated they are with American politics and culture, hell most Canadians know more about our current and history than they do about theirs.

I bet more people in Canada know who Donald Trump is than Gary Trudeau.

...wait, Justin.

This way they don't have to pretend anymore. Think of what that will do for their self esteem.




4) So that the idiot-in-chief doesn't decide to build a wall on the northern border.


3) Justin Bieber: So what does the Canadian music industry bring to the table? Elvis? The Beatles? Abba?

Nope - this guy:



How is that not grounds for retaliation? You tell me.


2) Sarah Palin could be able to see America from her back porch.


1) John Candy started it, it's time for us to finish it.

We've invaded countries based on "logic" almost this flimsy before.

[HawkTheSlayer]

The CIA and DOD are dusting off our attack Canada plans are we speak....

We should have attacked them long ago while they were weak and before all the anti-american rhetoric and French jihad started, led by the kebeccors and the french cajuns in louisiana!

[HawkTheSlayer]

Stay with me on this, it makes sense.

In no particular order also.


10) Culture: What is Canadian culture? What's the first thing you think of when you say "Canada"? Right, maple syrup (I tried it out on a couple people, 100% said just that). It's a commodity, not an identity.

So what's Canadian? Hockey? Nope, the NHL is a US league and only exists because of the American market. Clearly hockey is an American sport.

Poutine? What the $#@! is that? Gravy on french fries - how is that original? It's been done for centuries in many cultures. Oh wait, cheese curds - right, that's the Canadian part, pfft... It's like someone said "eh... what's this aboot, needs more, what's in the fridge?" "eh... bacon... syrup... beer, wait - use this, I bought it for fishing bait."

Poutine and maple syrup is a cry for help, won't you please help?


9) Liberation: From fascist, imperialist England. No longer will Canadians have to kiss the royal crown's ass and they can free themselves from the obsession of royal socialites. Then and only then will they ever know true freedom and independence.

Every other highway can now be changed from "King" or "Queen" way-something-or-another to... MLK Boulevard.

Gordie Howe on the loonie!


8) Don Cherry



Nuff said...


7) Political identity: Polling a few random people I asked "who is the prime minister of Canada". Survey said: Unanimous 50 yard stare.

I asked the same people who Rob Ford was and most of them knew which leads me to the conclusion that Canada's political system needs a shake up, that when Rob Ford was all the excitement in Canada for a short period of time in an otherwise droll, undefined political system is pretty much self explanatory.

Besides, Canada is basically a puppet state to the throne.


6) Potential market expansion for the NHL: It's time we bring "hockey" back to "Canadian hockey". Being absorbed by the US as the 51'st state (who, by population count would be our second largest state next to California) the number of Canadian NHL teams will easily double. There is a bit of interest in hockey in Canada from what I understand but with the surge of 'Murica after the invasion demand for the NHL will surge.

I can virtually guarantee it.


5) Identity: Canadians are basically America light, why not make them full blown Americans? That way they don't have to pretend anymore. We can see how infatuated they are with American politics and culture, hell most Canadians know more about our current and history than they do about theirs.

I bet more people in Canada know who Donald Trump is than Gary Trudeau.

...wait, Justin.

This way they don't have to pretend anymore. Think of what that will do for their self esteem.




4) So that the idiot-in-chief doesn't decide to build a wall on the northern border.


3) Justin Bieber: So what does the Canadian music industry bring to the table? Elvis? The Beatles? Abba?

Nope - this guy:



How is that not grounds for retaliation? You tell me.


2) Sarah Palin could be able to see America from her back porch.


1) John Candy started it, it's time for us to finish it.

Lol.

[Common Sense]

Bring it, eh!

[DGUtley]

Obviously, we are obviously trying to provoke a war — just look at all the bases we have so close to Canada.

D9A72072-0805-4219-83B8-3EC5844827DD.jpg

[Cthulhu]

We've invaded countries based on "logic" almost this flimsy before.

This makes more sense that the Iraq or Afghanistan invasions.

Sent from my evil cell phone.

[Cthulhu]

Okay, but only if we sink Quebec into the ocean.

Sent from my evil cell phone.