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Thread: I Believe In UFO's.

  1. #1
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    I Believe In UFO's.

    ``

    JAG Writes:


    This piece below is 100% fun lunacy.

    If you are not in the mood to read an absurd pointless piece, then read no further . . .

    ___________

    "There is good solid evidence for the reality of UFO's", say some people.

    My reply to them is this:

    ____________

    I believe in UFO's.

    Just yesterday my wife and I were out in the back yard when an Unidentified Flying Object
    landed on our patio table as we were relaxing sipping tea.

    Good Lands! I exclaimed, what can that be?

    My wife immediately recognized it as a UFO.

    I noticed that it was about 10 inches long and about 5 inches wide.

    It made a humming sound as it landed.

    The humming sound continued for about 3 minutes and then began to slowly die down.

    We didn't know what to think about that, so we just sat there flabbergasted and bewildered staring at the UFO.

    Suddenly we saw the door in the side of the UFO open, and out stepped 3 little orange colored men about 2 inches tall.

    One of them said Hello JAG, how are you?

    I'm doing just fine. I replied, and I hope you are doing well yourself.

    Listen I said, is that a spaceship you all just landed on my patio table?

    Yes it is, said one of the little orange men.

    Then they introduced themselves.

    The one who first spoke to me said he was the leader and that his name was Qzxzzxzzxzqqqxq,
    but I could just call him
    Bob, because that would make things much less complicated.

    The other two introduced themselves as Henry and Tom.

    Okay I said, and by the way, where are you all from?

    We're from the Andromeda Galaxy some 2.5 million light years from Earth, said Bob.

    Well I said, that's interesting Bob. What planet are you from?

    Sorry, replied Bob, but we can't tell you that, its classified.

    Okay Bob I said, can you tell me why you all have landed your spaceship on my patio table?

    We were sent to Earth just to see you JAG, said Henry.

    Good lands! I replied, why me? Why would you travel all that distance just to see me?

    We came to tell you that Donald Trump is not really an Earthling.

    What? I exclaimed, you mean he's not one of us?

    That's right, said Henry.

    Donald Trump is from another planet and he was sent here to Earth to prepare you Earthlings.
    for more and more friendly visits from we visitors from Outer Space.

    Really? I exclaimed, You mean they're coming here to be our friends? To help us?

    Yes indeed, replied Bob. There is a lot we know that can help you Earthlings, a whole lot.

    Can you give me an example, I asked.

    Sure I can, replied Bob. You JAG are a Republican , and we can tell you that we know for an
    absolute fact, that Republicanism is the absolute truth.

    I always knew it was, I replied, but it makes my heart glad to hear it from you good folks
    out there in the Andromeda Galaxy.

    What else can you tell me that will cheer my heart, I asked.

    We can tell you JAG, that you are a solid gold human being, and we have great hopes for you.

    Thank you very much I replied, and may the Force be with you.

    Thanks JAG, and may the Force be with you too, and the wifey as well.

    My wife smiled at hearing that, and said, "Thanks guys, much appreciated."

    Well, said Bob, we have to be getting on back home. It was nice chatting with you JAG, and we'll be in touch.

    Sounds good to me, you all take care now.

    Goodbye JAG.

    So long fellows, I said.

    Then Bob, and Tom, and Henry returned to their spaceship and took off into the blue yonder.

    The End.
    _______

    LOL

    Scot Me Up Beamy.


    ``````

  2. The Following 3 Users Say Thank You to JAG For This Useful Post:

    Calypso Jones (08-12-2020),Trish (07-22-2020)

  3. #2
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    ΜOΛΩΝ ΛΑΒΕ


  4. The Following User Says Thank You to Peter1469 For This Useful Post:

    BenjaminO (07-22-2020)

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    A vivid memory growing up being told by bible bearing christians when asked if there might be life on other planets is...no, there can't be.
    Why not? Because the bible doesn't say so.
    M'kay.
    One more reason to get as far away from that crap as possible.
    Red Green
    The man's prayer:

    I'm a man
    But I can change
    If I have to
    I guess


  6. #4
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    Quote Originally Posted by BenjaminO View Post
    A vivid memory growing up being told by bible bearing christians
    when asked if there might be life on other planets is...no, there can't be.
    Why not? Because the bible doesn't say so.
    M'kay.
    One more reason to get as far away from that crap as possible.
    Never mind that JAG wrote the following in the opening paragraph.
    JAG Wrote:
    "This piece below is 100% fun lunacy.
    If you are not in the mood to read an absurd pointless piece, then read no further . . ."___JAG

    Never mind that the Opening Post does not deny that there could be life on other planets.

    Never mind that I who wrote the Opening Post believe that there COULD BE life on other planets.

    Never mind that my opening Post has zero to do with the "crap" that you want to get away from.

    ______

    By the way, your posts are a real joy to read.
    You always write bright cheerful up-lifting posts.
    Thank you so much for that.


    JAG

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    rcfieldz's Avatar Senior Member
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    This thread is stupid. Hope the Aliens abduct you.

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    Quote Originally Posted by JAG View Post
    Never mind that JAG wrote the following in the opening paragraph.
    JAG Wrote:
    "This piece below is 100% fun lunacy.
    If you are not in the mood to read an absurd pointless piece, then read no further . . ."___JAG

    Never mind that the Opening Post does not deny that there could be life on other planets.

    Never mind that I who wrote the Opening Post believe that there COULD BE life on other planets.

    Never mind that my opening Post has zero to do with the "crap" that you want to get away from.

    ______

    By the way, your posts are a real joy to read.
    You always write bright cheerful up-lifting posts.
    Thank you so much for that.


    JAG
    Never mind that I wasn't engaging JAG in my post.
    Never mind that I was reminded of an experience from a long time ago.
    So...never mind.
    M'kay
    Red Green
    The man's prayer:

    I'm a man
    But I can change
    If I have to
    I guess


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    Trish's Avatar Senior Member
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    Quite a story. You had me going until I got down to the republican comments. Then I knew this was complete fiction. (wink)

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    Quote Originally Posted by rcfieldz View Post
    This thread is stupid.
    Hope the Aliens abduct you.
    No the thread is not stupid.
    You are wrong.
    You have probably been wrong many times.
    You are wrong once again.
    Wrong.

    By the way I wrote this in the very first sentences:

    JAG Wrote:
    "This piece below is 100% fun lunacy.
    If you are not in the mood to read an absurd pointless piece, then read no further . . ."___JAG

    Did you not read that?

    ________

    Why would you want the aliens to kidnap me?
    Do you have strong hostility in your heart?
    If the aliens kidnapped me I would be taken away from my wife and family,
    is that what you want to see happen to be merely because you did not like my fun story/

    Do you have a kind compassionate heart?

    Best.

    JAG

  11. #9
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    Quote Originally Posted by BenjaminO View Post
    Never mind that I wasn't engaging JAG in my post.
    Never mind that I was reminded of an experience from a long time ago.
    So...never mind.
    M'kay
    Cool.
    Never mind.
    ___________


    A little excerpt from my fun story to brighten up your day:

    JAG Wrote:
    Yes indeed, replied Bob. There is a lot we know that can help you Earthlings, a whole lot.

    Can you give me an example, I asked.

    Sure I can, replied Bob. You JAG are a Republican , and we can tell you that we know for an
    absolute fact, that Republicanism is the absolute truth.

    I always knew it was, I replied, but it makes my heart glad to hear it from you good folks
    out there in the Andromeda Galaxy."___JAG

    ___________



    God Bless the Republican Party.
    And God bless you too, BenjaminO

    JAG

    ``

  12. #10
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    Quote Originally Posted by Trish View Post
    Quite a story. You had me going until I got down to the
    republican comments. Then I knew this was complete fiction. (wink)
    Thanks Trish.
    And thanks for reading my crazy fun story.

    May The Force be with us.

    _______


    Scot me up Beamy.


    JAG


    ``

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