NEW YORK (The Borowitz Report)—Dropping a bombshell that could radically alter the playing field of the 2020 election, Fox News Channel has reported that Joe Biden paid no porn stars over the past five decades.
Tucker Carlson first reported the stunning revelations on his prime-time show, calling Biden’s history of avoiding paying porn stars “unbecoming of someone seeking the nation’s highest office.”
“We have obtained Joe Biden’s banking records going back to 1973, and there is no evidence—I repeat, no evidence—of any payments to porn stars,” Carlson said. “Joe Biden has a lot of explaining to do.”
At the White House, Donald J. Trump called Biden’s record of not paying porn stars “disgraceful” and claimed that it should disqualify him from serving as President.
“Joe Biden says he’s a man of the people, but this proves he’s a fake,” Trump said. “The average, hard-working American pays thousands to porn stars each year.”
https://www.newyorker.com/humor/boro...-no-porn-stars
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Originally Posted by Lummy
