I am the very model of our modern, moral consequence.
I will inflame and fluster one and all who seek for commonsense,
Confuse the undecided that have perched upon their pretty fence,
And suffer all the fools who would but think that they are not so dense.
To help me to persuade you, I have mastered all the arts of spin,
But like some others, I am not a fevered fan of deathly din,
I merely, meekly wish to bring the world to its modernity,
And keep it there, with warts and all for ever. That's eternity!
And whilst this will inflame and fluster all of you with commonsense,
Just remember that I do all this without the fear of recompense!
To be sung to the tune, 'Modern Major General' by Gilbert and Sullivan
With apologies to same....