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Thread: We Keep The Intellect (Albert) Chained Up In The Basement.

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    We Keep The Intellect (Albert) Chained Up In The Basement.

    We Keep The Intellect (Albert) Chained Up In The Basement.
    By JAG
    October 12. 2021


    "You reject the contributions of the Intellect"__Professor Bobby Brainy


    Oh no sir, you are incorrect. I do not disassociate myself from the Intellect.
    No Sir Ree Bob, no not at all.. Why the Intellect is part of my family. He's an
    arrogant little banty rooster much of the time, but he's family. So we all love
    him. However we have to watch him with the eyes of a hawk because he's
    dangerous to himself and to others.


    A long time ago the Smith Family had Aunt Bertha come to live with them
    after her husband died and tweren't long before Aunt Bertha went crazy
    and became known as the Crazy Aunt. So the Smith Family they kept her
    chained up in the attic because she had bit two of their young children on
    four different occasions. The Smith Family ought to have found a better
    way to control Aunt Bertha but they couldn't think of one, and back then
    there were no insane asylums in their part of the country ~ so up in the
    attic lived their Crazy Aunt.


    So?


    So Intellect is a member of our family and he's a "Crazy Aunt" but we love
    him and we keep him around at all times and we wouldn't even think about
    putting Intellect in the attic. No Sir Ree Bob, we keep him chained up in the
    basement. But we bring him out now and then so he can strut about and
    "play Einstein". He likes to call it "playing Albert" . Many times Albert (his
    real name is Albert) can make a very useful contribution to the global
    conversation, but much of the time Albert is a self-seeking arrogant
    know-it-all who incorrectly assumes he has wisdom because he had
    the ability to memorize huge data dumps of material and then parrot
    it all back to his professors at examination time.


    They gave Albert a degree back before he came to live with us, but
    Albert has the wisdom of a four year old child and Albert is dangerous
    so we keep him on a chain in the basement. We fixed it up real nice
    for him down there. Spent $25,000 too. Albert's rooms in the basement
    are much nicer than our rooms upstairs.


    Last year Albert wrote a book titled: "Why Everybody In My Family Is
    Going To Hell Except Me." Of course Albert doesn't believe Hell is real.
    He told us we'd have to read his book to find out why he put the word
    Hell in his title. But we never got around to reading it.


    Albert is, at the present time, not regenerated. Albert sneers at us when
    we tell him he must be born again (John 3:3) and that he must believe
    in Jesus as his Savior. Albert says that the solutions to human problems
    are to be found in Science and Secular Humanism, not in Jesus, God, or
    the Bible.


    We gave Albert a new NIV Bible last year, but he told us he took it "into the
    bathroom and disrespected it." He wouldn't tell us what he meant by that
    and we never did know if Albert really did that, or was only trying to rattle
    our cage. We never saw that NIV Bible again.


    Albert sneers at Colossians chapter 2. In Christ are hidden all the
    treasures of wisdom and knowledge so don't let anyone "deceive you by
    fine sounding arguments . . . [and] see to it that no one takes you captive
    through hollow and deceptive philosophy."


    Pray for Albert, that he will come to repentance for the intellectual pride of
    his heart and that he will repent of it, and put his faith in the Lord Jesus as
    his Savior before its too late, and his fallen corrupted intellect becomes the
    road that takes Albert to the perish of John 3:16 instead of to the Eternal
    Life of John 3:16.


    "For God so loved the world that He gave His one and only Son that whoever
    believes in Him shall not perish but have eternal life."


    Thoughts?


    []

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    Wtf?
    "Don't underestimate Joe's ability to f--- things up." - Barack Obama

  3. The Following User Says Thank You to Cletus For This Useful Post:

    BenjaminO (10-12-2021)

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    Quote Originally Posted by Cletus View Post
    Wtf?
    I'll second that.
    It's not the bridges burned that bother me but the ones that I never crossed
    Lone Watie:
    Get ready, little lady. Hell is coming to breakfast.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Cletus View Post
    Wtf?

    The OP is a brief non-rhyming piece of fictional poetry written from
    the viewpoint of an Evangelical Christian. If one will give the OP a
    charitable reading and make an honest attempt to "see the point",
    then one will have no problem understanding the point.


    You don't have to agree with my point, in order to understand
    my point ~ which point is that Secular Humanism and Secular
    Intellectualism is inharmonious with traditional Biblical Christianity.

    Its obviously a brief work of fiction because a human intellect cannot
    live in a basement and could not have the name Albert. The piece also
    contains some subtle humor and most likely would cause some Bible
    believing Evangelicals to grin or at least smile at the antics of "Albert."

    The last three paragraphs in the piece present the standard Evangelical
    Christian call not to trust in the power of secular intellectual argumentation
    and for repentance followed by faith in the Lord Jesus as Savior.

    Best Regards,

    JAG

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