I completely sympathize. That IS how it works around here. But that is how it works everywhere now.
People do not accept an alternate reality immediately. They have to let it sit for a while before they accept it.
The problem is that when they lash out in anger and start launching ad homs, it does something that prevents them from assimilating the new information you have given them.
When they insult you, its a way of protecting their mental status quo. Cognitive dissonance is a $#@!.