HUNDRED ACRE WOOD—Within hours of Congress passing a new "red flag" law, local resident Winnie the Pooh has had all his firearms confiscated by authorities.
"We knew we had to act quickly after receiving several complaints from Rabbit, who lives nearby," said local ATF Agent Dexter Jagular. "Apparently, this 'Pooh' character has been having deranged paranoid delusions about 'Heffalumps and Woozles' coming to steal his stash of honey. This is clearly a disturbed individual."
According to sources, the breaking point came when Pooh pulled a rifle on his friend Tigger, who—according to neighbors—was only paying a friendly visit. "We knew then he was dangerous and had to be immediately disarmed," said Rabbit after submitting the complaint.
https://babylonbee.com/news/winnie-t...-red-flag-law/
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